A pirates life for me

Arr! Ahoy, mateys. I be swashbucklin' on thar' great, grand livin' room and wishin me had sum 'ole booty and doubloons instead o this here fake sword. Me sister lasses not be likin' me fun buccaneer games and they be wishin me were walkin the plank. The lasses are always lily-livered and landlubbers. Yeah, I say I be needed sum new jacks and gentleman o' fortunes to play with. Maybe that thar little nicker, Colby will join in my fun and no, ne'er be a squiffy. Yo, ho ho.

It's Colbster's Half Birthday

Mom? I think I see some food on the TV.

I'm a little tea-pot. Short and stout. Here is my shirt that won't go over my...

what is a synonym for "big melon" that rhymes with stout?

I could just sit here all day. Leave the bananas, I'm

not quite done yet. Just taking a breather.
Does it make me look skinnier if I suck in my cheeks like this?

Are we really simplifying?

"Kids-lets simplify. Instead of having different sports/arts teams, lets all vote and pick the same one so that we can all go on the same night."

"But I want gymnastics."

"I want ballet."

"I want karate."

"No, I forgot. I want soccer."

"I like basketball, too."

"That isn't fair. I said a long time ago I wanted t-ball."

"What about horseback riding and swimming lessons. Do they count, too?

"What about the sports that are different seasons. That isn't fair to do gymnastics all year when we could do baseball, basketball, and soccer instead."

"We already did what you wanted last week. We went to the restaurant you picked. It's my turn to pick now."

Look for updates with results of this deomocratic procedure...

maybe.

The one day at Disney with a camera

Top 12 Things you DO want to hear/see at Disney World

1. Mom, you are amazing. This is the best trip ever!
2. Dear, sweet wife... I am so glad you spent all that time researching and planning out each place in the order, time, and location that we should go. It made all the difference!
3. You sure are prepared. We will never be hungry, thirsty, need glowsticks, treats, or activities. You seriously thought of everything! It must have taken a long time to pack. And then to pack again each day for the parks. Thank you so much!
4. All tourists have gone home for the day due to overcast, nice breezy weather. Feel free to enjoy all the rides with no wait, height restrictions, or random things shooting at you getting you wet.
5. You can just stay at one theater, all the different shows, musical acts, and stunts will come to you.
6. Here are your segways for the family- including a special "Tucker" track with no obstacles, pushy people that don't have any manners, or those that think it is ok to run/bump/push into kids, cause they aren't really there. Oh, and there is a neck high wall so that your children won't see all the memorabilia that the two working parents with only one child have gotten.
7. Your family is so precious and well-mannered: no fussiness, exhaustion, or whining. Can I offer to pay for your entire trip-including, but not limited to meals, hotel, babysitter fees, and transportation? It would be my absolute pleasure!
8. Can we do it again? Do we have to go home?
9. I'm not scared. I don't care if the rides are loud, fast, in the dark, whirling, or crazy. I want to do them again and again.
10. It's no big deal to drive 6 hours and come and help for the day at the water park. That's what grandparents are for!
11. Colby was a dream to babysit. He had no problems taking formula. I would love to do it everyday!
12. Of course we'll go to bed so you and dad can spend some time together. You have been doing so much for us and we have had such a great time. How about we go to bed a little early. We will get our pajamas, brush our teeth, and sing our own songs. We'll light some candles for you and order some non-G rated movies and chocolate covered strawberries. You just sit back and enjoy your vacation. After all, it isn't just about the kids, you know!

Top 12 Things you DON'T want to hear/see at Disney World

1. Mom, this is a "little bored". Can we go back to the hotel now and go swimming?
2. Mom, we don't want to eat what you packed for lunch, we want to go to the character lunch and dinner. I don't know what "booked" means.
3. Where did those girls get their face painted/hair done/ and princess clothes? Can we get them here?
4. I don't want to carry my...water bottle, snacks, purse, Disney autograph book, baby, toys anymore. Can you carry them?
5. My feet hurt. Can you carry me?
6. How much longer do we have to wait?
7. You have to be 45" to ride.
8. Fireworks are at 10:00 pm.
9. Must be a strong swimmer to ride.
10. Part of ride takes place in the dark.
11. We left the camera at the hotel.
12. We brought our camera today. The batteries are dead.
13. I can't see.
14. Oh, you didn't know? This is the busiest week of the entire year. Have fun!