Just complaining...move on to another post for your own good!

I remember when my friends were pregnant before I was. As much as I wanted to be supportive and empathetic... my goodness, is that ALL they could talk about? There are so many topics out there...politics, movies, books, relationships between mothers and daughters/siblings/spouses/in-laws, birth order and its effects, cooking with wheat, practical healthy lifestyle choices, environment versus genetics, the effects of alcohol/drugs on a family environment, African American misrepresentation in US history, feminine equality in the 20th century (ok, so I spent a lot of classes in psychology) and on and on.

I admit, I did a horrible job when I was pregnant with Alexis. It had taken two years to get pregnant with surgery and fertility drugs. How could I not talk about this exciting time in our lives? How could everyone else not want to hear the wonders of childbearing? I needed everyone to truly "get" the miracle that was happening every single day as fingernails were forming, organs were starting to work, and how she would respond to loud sounds. And MY interpretation of "getting" something means to say it over and over, until I see a change in the audience and they seem to be just as excited and mesmorized as I. (don't worry, a lot of my friends were in theatre and had no problem in their acting capabilities)

Well, now we are to our 4th full-term pregnancy. Things are a little different. I can no longer think of things to talk about besides how awful I feel and how each day is taking forrreevvvveerrr. I am no longer as amazed at the wonders and miracle of birth. Actually, I think I could make some changes to the process that could be a little more efficient and less restricting. For one, as you have more babies, your body should react less to the demands of carrying a fetus. The formula would go something like:

fetus x (number of kids + fetus)= energy level (measured in laps you could do during your pregnancy without breaking a sweat or breathing hard- in the last trimester)
So, a first time mom would have 1 x 1= 1 lap without sweating
BUT a mom of 10 would be 1 x 11=11 laps without sweating
Doesn't it make sense that a mom with other kids needs more energy and has much more to do?


Why would each baby need 9 months to develop? If the rest of your body falls apart and poofs out because it "already knows what to do," then the babies development should take that into consideration. (not to mention that you have other children to take care of that don't care if mom has contractions/no energy to play/or patience) Your body doesn't need Braxton Hicks, cramping, or swelling SOONER to prepare you for birth; your cervex, uterus, and pelvis are quite aware of their performance necessities and are basically in the right position and size from the moment you conceive anyway.
Another formula that would work well for my situation...

fetus x 9/ (number of kids + fetus)= months needed until birth
Ex. New mom (1 x 9)/1=9 months till birth
BUT Mom of 5 would be (1 x 9)/6= 1.5 months

These suggestions are merely from a technical and scientific viewpoint, of course. Rhet doesn't like to hear some of my intelligent corrections for evolution in the fear that he will have to repair the roof from lightening strikes headed my way.

And, since I don't want to write in my journal how unhealthy my psyche is right now in the fear that poor Colby might read it one day and know how much I complained while he was cooking in my oven... I get to write it here on my blog...with no worries that Rhet will ever read this (because it is way too long) or that any of my children will know my twisted thoughts (they scroll right to their own pictures)- and if you care enough to have gotten this far...then chances are you have already heard my ranting and it won't effect your opinion of me. Two final words...


Pregnancy STINKS!